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HAPPY HALLOWEEN

WATCH OUT FOR
BRAIN EATING ZOMBIES

If This Fucker Is "Sober"...



...I'm The Queen of England.

Can You Tell Me How To Get, How To Get To...

Schwarzenegger Street?

It's Enron-Tastic!

(Thanks to Hawkerhurricane at DU for this. Priceless.)

The only debate on Intelligent Design that is worthy of its subject.

Moderator: We're here today to debate the hot new topic, evolution versus Intelligent Des---

(Scientist pulls out baseball bat.)

Moderator: Hey, what are you doing?

(Scientist breaks Intelligent Design advocate's kneecap.)

Intelligent Design advocate: YEAAARRRRGGGHHHH! YOU BROKE MY KNEECAP!

Scientist: Perhaps it only appears that I broke your kneecap. Certainly, all the evidence points to the hypothesis I broke your kneecap. For example, your kneecap is broken; it appears to be a fresh wound; and I am holding a baseball bat, which is spattered with your blood. However, a mere preponderance of evidence doesn't mean anything. Perhaps your kneecap was designed that way. Certainly, there are some features of the current situation that are inexplicable according to the "naturalistic" explanation you have just advanced, such as the exact contours of the excruciating pain that you are experiencing right now.

Intelligent Design advocate: AAAAH! THE PAIN!

Scientist: Frankly, I personally find it completely implausible that the random actions of a scientist such as myself could cause pain of this particular kind. I have no precise explanation for why I find this hypothesis implausible --- it just is. Your knee must have been designed that way!

Intelligent Design advocate: YOU BASTARD! YOU KNOW YOU DID IT!

Scientist: I surely do not. How can we know anything for certain? Frankly, I think we should expose people to all points of view. Furthermore, you should really re-examine whether your hypothesis is scientific at all: the breaking of your kneecap happened in the past, so we can't rewind and run it over again, like a laboratory experiment. Even if we could, it wouldn't prove that I broke your kneecap the previous time. Plus, let's not even get into the fact that the entire universe might have just popped into existence right before I said this sentence, with all the evidence of my alleged kneecap-breaking already pre-formed.

Intelligent Design advocate: That's a load of bullshit sophistry! Get me a doctor and a lawyer, not necessarily in that order, and we'll see how that plays in court!

Scientist (turning to audience): And so we see, ladies and gentlemen, when push comes to shove, advocates of Intelligent Design do not actually believe any of the arguments that they profess to believe. When it comes to matters that hit home, they prefer evidence, the scientific method, testable hypotheses, and naturalistic explanations. In fact, they strongly privilege naturalistic explanations over supernatural hocus-pocus or metaphysical wankery. It is only within the reality-distortion field of their ideological crusade that they give credence to the flimsy, ridiculous arguments which we so commonly see on display. I must confess, it kind of felt good, for once, to be the one spouting free-form bullshit; it's so terribly easy and relaxing, compared to marshaling rigorous arguments backed up by empirical evidence. But I fear that if I were to continue, then it would be habit-forming, and bad for my soul. Therefore, I bid you adieu.

Tom DeLay has been arrested and booked like a common criminal (when, it could be argued, he's a very uncommon one) ...

Indictments could very well be imminent in the outing of Valerie Plame..

Bill Frist has gone from merely being guilty of being an asshole to possibly being guilty of other stuff, too...

George W. Bush may not be batshit out of his mind, holed up at the White House like a rat in a drain ditch on a serious Jim Beam & Pepto Bismol Bender... but he's sure as hell acting- and looking- like he is.

So, it's quite possible, in my mind, that the far right wing house of cards that has ran roughshod over this nation and her constitution for the past several years may be close to, if not collapsing, at least falling apart enough to seriously fuck up their chances for the 2006 midterms.

(Assuming, of course, that a certain other political party can find its balls in time- but that's another story... for another Joe Leiberman can kiss my ass day.)

With that in mind, however, on the off chance that the fat lady is affixing her horned helmet and spraying her throat with chloraseptic... we've started to compile a list of questions- nagging little loose ends- that we would really, really, REALLY like answered or wrapped up when our long, national nightmare is finally over:

1. If we're in Iraq to liberate the Iraqi people, and are all set to clear out 'the minute' they have things under control and want us to leave, why are we building, by some accounts, 14 permanent military bases in the country? On the assumption that the Shiite theocracy our tax dollars are creating there will request our continued presence? Inquiring minds, well, yeah... we pretty much figure we know the answer already.



2. Hey. Remember 9-11? Sure you do. Fuckin' GOP waves that bloody shirt every time they want to debate the god-damn flat tax. But.. remember how someone made millions in statistically anomalous 'short selling' of airline stock immeditately prior to the attacks? I know that, in this age of Total Information Awareness, where every ATM transaction, much less stock sale, is meticulously recorded, finding out who stood to profit by several million from a specific trade might be kind of a pain in the ass, and the media sure didn't seem interested in pursuing that story... but- for us?



3. Speaking of stories the media wanted to forget about all of a sudden... whatever did happen to that whole Anthrax investigation? You know, Press Guys, it's been long enough now that it could be played as a 'retro, fashion' thing to bring it up. Like, Paris Hilton! There ya go.



4. More weird shit: What was the deal with Nabil Al-Marabh? How come some Marin Hottubber like John Walker Lindh was such a massive threat to our country, but this guy- an actual terrorist with proven links to 9-11, had to be let go, paradoxically to "protect national security"? Hmmmmmmmm?



5. Speaking of Valerie Plame.. So, uh, who was actually responsible for the original Nigerian Yellowcake Document Forgery?



6. What happened to the $9 Billion from in Iraqi Reconstruction money from the US Treasury that mysteriously vanished and 'cannot be accounted for'? (Here's a hint- check the duffel bags)



7. Speaking of Ripping US Citizens off to the tune of billions, why the FUCK is Ken Lay still a free man?



8. And speaking of Ken Lay, what did he and Arnold Schwarzenegger speak about at their secret meeting during the height of California's (cough, cough) "energy crisis", you know, the one which was pinned on Gray Davis, ensuring his political demise? Golf?



9. Did someone say Secret? Energy? Meeting?



10. Where's Osama? Remember him?



11. Let us just be clear on one thing: a blowjob and a semen stain are impeachment worthy, but deliberately taking this country to war on a shabby pack of lies is... what?

More soon.

Thanks to H2OMAN at DU for that uplifting thought and image for the day.


Also: New Rule, to rip off Bill Maher- I can take criticism, griping, even incoherent far right spittle-fueled ranting in my comments, but one thing this dude just cannot abide is fuckin' SPAM. If you want to leave a comment, you better make damn clear through what you write that you're responding individually, in a pertinent fashion, to MY blog and the ideas presented herein. Otherwise you'll be deleted, period. I'm only saying this once.

Today's Profile In Courage: Judge Alvin K. Hellerstein.

For finally, after some 2 years of governmental delays and game-playing, ordering the release of additional photographic evidence from Abu Ghraib.

Clearly, the DoD and the Bush Administration will appeal this ruling, and they have 20 days in which to do so. If the photos and videos contain the kind of explosive evidence that some, like Sy Hersh, have previously alleged, the gummint will fight tooth and nail (actually, they already have, throwing everything, including General Myers and his kitchen sink, at Judge Hellerstein) to prevent them from seeing the light of day.


This is NOT about "more of the same", this is evidence of what has been done in the NAME of the AMERICAN PEOPLE with OUR TAX DOLLARS, and concurrently it is evidence which can corroborate allegations of a widespread policy of abuse actively encouraged by higher-ups in the chain of command, as opposed to the work of the ever-popular "few bad apples" like Lynndie England.

The Judge may have taken his time, but in the end he did the right thing. I will let his words speak for themselves:

Our nation does not surrender to blackmail, and fear of blackmail is not a legally sufficient argument to prevent us from performing a statutory command. Indeed, the freedoms
that we champion are as important to our success in Iraq and Afghanistan as the guns and
missiles with which our troops are armed.
...

With great respect to the concerns expressed by General Myers, my task is not to defer to our worst fears, but to interpret and apply the law, in this case, the Freedom of Information Act, which advances values important to our society, transparency and accountability in government.

...

The interest at stake arises from pictures of flagrantly improper conduct by
American soldiers - forcing prisoners under their charge to pose in a manner that compromised their humanity and dignity. As I stated at the time of the original argument, and as I reiterated previously in this decision, the pictures are the best evidence of what happened, better than words, which might fail to describe, or summaries, which might err in their attempt to generalize and abbreviate.

Publication of the photographs is central to the purposes of FOIA because they initiate debate, not only about the improper and unlawful conduct of American soldiers, "rogue" soldiers, as they have been characterized, but also about other important questions as well-for example, the command structure that failed to exercise discipline over the troops, and the persons in that command structure whose failures in exercising supervision may make them culpable along with the soldiers who were court-martialed for perpetrating the wrongs; the poor training that did not create patterns of proper behavior and that failed to teach or distinguish between conduct that was proper and improper; the regulations and orders that governed the conduct of military forces engaged in guarding prisoners; the treatment of prisoners in other areas and places of detention; and other related questions.

Suppression of information is the surest way to cause its significance to grow and
persist. Clarity and openness are the best antidotes, either to dispel criticism if not merited or, if merited, to correct such errors as may be found.

...

Our struggle to prevail must be without sacrificing the transparency and accountability of government and military officials. These are the values FOIA was intended to advance, and they are at the very heart of the values for which we fight in Afghanistan and Iraq.

There is a risk that the enemy will seize upon the publicity of the photographs and seek to use such publicity as a pretext for enlistments and violent acts. But the education and debate that such publicity will foster will strengthen our purpose and, by enabling such deficiencies as may be perceived to be debated and corrected, show our strength as a vibrant and functioning democracy to be emulated.

In its most recent discussion of FOIA, the Supreme Court commented that
"FOIA is often explained as a means for citizens to know what 'their Government is up to.' The sentiment is far from a convenient formalism. It defines a structural necessity in a real democracy."

As President Bush said, we fight to spread freedom so the freedoms of Americans will be made more secure. It is in compliance with these principles, enunciated by both the President and the highest court in the land, that I order the government to produce the Darby photographs that I have ruled are responsive and appropriately redacted.

Way to go, Judge. Way to go.

I strongly urge everyone to support The ACLU (translation: send 'em a check) because they've done a bang-up job with this... and with the inevitable DoD appeal, it's quite likely not over yet.

Quote From Goodwill (and "Good News") Ambassador To Christ-Deprived Mooooslams, Karen Hughes:
"Our Constitution Cites 'One Nation Under God'"

Now, let's be fair to ol' Karen (She's a Maaaaaan, Baby!) and try to put her TOTAL lack of knowledge of the U.S. Constitution in perspective..
...I mean, how well do YOU know the paper you wipe your ass on?

More Of That Librul Environmentalist Tree-Hugger Global Warming Junk Science:
Instead of a Sleigh, Pretty Soon Santa's Gonna Need a Sub.